is wine microwaveable?
I just fucked a rockette. This would have been amazing a week ago.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
We had sex in the bathroom. Good sex. Toilet breaking sex.
who was i chillin with last night? i woke up in a storage unit
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
If I were better looking, this would be the point where I'd resign myself to stripping.
I mean really am I setting up a snapchat when I'm 40 so I can send nudes to my 23 yr old bf? yes, yes I am. Where is my life heading.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
You shouted “im bobby labonte!” In the process of shoutgunning a beer. He said you were too redneck for him...
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
