So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
I just told this girl who bought a pregnancy test "good luck"
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
DAMN HIS BEARD AND ABILITY TO USE TOOLS ON A LADDER!!
Do not ever look at a picture of an erect ostrich penis. You will regret it.
My ex is stopping by while he’s working tonight after delivering a pizza to fuck me, then going back to work at Pizza Hut. This is what my life has become.
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