I could make wine with my vomit
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
WHAT THE FUCK DREAM ME
I'M GONNA PUNCH THAT BITCH THE FUCK DID SHE THINK SHE WAS DOIN
We got cut off at a bar at 4pm. We aren't human
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
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