Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
high enough to want to lick peanut butter off of Michael Buble's vocal chords as he serenades me.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
There's jack Daniels coming out of my eyes instead of tears.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
Text me some of your sweat
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
Randomize