I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
i just called corporate taco bell to ask about the life span of a chicken burrito.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
JUST SAW MY DRUG DEALER SOBER AND GOING TO CLASS. This is weird, its almost like he's an actual student whio leaves his room...
Thats why you always identify the subtext of a blowjob before you accept it.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
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