Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
It's not prostitution until you're out of college. Right now it's just strategic boning.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
I'm standing in the shower drinking with the light off and a candle lit, listening to Amy Winehouse. Be proud.
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
What would you say is the recommended tip for a hotel maid who has to clean up vomit on just about every surface of a hotel bathroom?
For breaking and entering. I think neighbor dan cared more about me puking in his backseat than the surprise of me waking up there
Question. There's no better feeling than clean shaven balls. Do girls get that too?
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
