I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
SO DRUNK
PUKED IN DRIVEWAY
TELL PARENTS SORRY
I need to start a penis folder so I stop "accidentally" showing people my junk. On a side note- St. Pattys penis was a hit, four leaf clover and all.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
i woke up in a bed of pop tarts
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Randomize
