Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
you looked like a weeble wobble. everytime we thought you were going to fall you bounced back up...you're an amazing drunk
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
I just took three of the most beautiful hits of my life. As elegant and smooth and delicate and graceful as figure skating
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
I got to her place and she was petting her cat and pounding vodka out of the bottle. She looked like Dr evil in yoga pants. She's nuttier than squirrell shit.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
Literally had a conversation with the pizza as to why it was a bad idea to reach in the back seat and grab a slice while driving. The pizza was right, it was safer to just wait until I got home.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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