either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
