i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
You did a jig for the bouncer when you saw him. Just reminding you.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
I was just expressing concern for your pickle consumption.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
