Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
One of my bosses just told me she's having communication problems because mercury is in retrograde this month. I think she's serious.
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
i was trying to give him roadhead and my tits kept knocking his cheap shifter into neutral...was the first time my tits have ever cock blocked me
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
Well, if he didn't want to get caught mid-gay experience by his girlfriend, he shouldn't have pushed so hard to do MDMA with me.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
Pssh I just bang a girl in a single person tent. Thats like the back seat of a sedan.
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
Randomize
