So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Randomize
