whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
He yelled "HOO-ah!" like Al Pacino when he pulled down his pants. Trust me, he has every right to.
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
Ate 5 hotdogs today. You need to get me back on my tequila diet cause this shit has to stop!
I just saw a girl on the phone crying and eating a sandwich. Thats talent right there.
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