the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I had sex on a seadoo on the middle of the lake lastnight
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
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