If a girl drunk dials you she's at least entertained the idea of sleeping w/ you correct?
YES
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
She is going down in cock block history. He went in to kiss me and she threw her hand between our faces and yelled "DENIED!"
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize