ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
When we found you, you were half crying/half singing Taylor swift songs at 2am in the bathroom, and occasionally puking. I think I get "friend of the year" award just for putting up with your drunk ass all night.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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