all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
Woke up w/ the same freshman as last Saturday but we were sober this time. Is that a relationship?
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
that is very illegal...i love you.
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