i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
we left the bar for like 10 minutes last night and moved his car so it wouldnt get towed. neither of us have a clue where it is right now.
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
just left a line of flour and citric acid on the dresser for my roommate to find. teach that bastard to steal my coke!
The guy in the next stall screamed courtesy flush and then puked. Bless you Vegas
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
Considering how much money I just spent on slutty lingerie, it is totally appropriate for me to be plucking my nipple hair right now. Right?
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
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