oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
you called me at 4 in the morning to tell me that your toaster burnt your english muffin, and that you "fuckin hated that thing."
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
I'm at breakfast at my kid's school and I have noted at least 3 other parents with last night's red wine mouth and bleary eyes. I don't know why I always get so paranoid.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
I just realized I consumed seven different types of alcohol this weekend. And I'm only counting jungle juice as one of those. How the fuck did I not die?
Did not foresee holding down food at work today to be a struggle today
We don't have paper towels so I microwaved a spinach/egg sandwich thingy wrapped in toilet paper. Toilet paper. so that's how my day started.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I love you. Go after that dick
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
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