Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
Riding on an electric horse at the grocery store... dunno how that conversation went but I hope you picked up a 12 pack.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
You were such a shitshow...I was just standing in the kitchen eating my toaster strudel and you came in, whispered "you didn't see anything" and led him to the couch
Ice that vagina down, get some coffee, and try not to walk with a limp. It's time to dominate, pull it together
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
Randomize
