So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
I promise you 4 toothbrushes taped together and lube does not do the trick
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
You gave the cab driver your pants as collateral while you ran in the house for money.
You working tonight?
Keg. Hottub. Wearimnh a 8th graders bikini. Mess
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Omg the sex was so good my ears popped. Thank god too. Cause then I didn't have to hear him going on and on about his dumbass feelings. It's called a booty call bitch.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Randomize
