I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
There's that certain point at night when you start saying things like s'mores should be used in foreign relations. I reached it.
Dude at one point I lost you only to find you sitting in the bushes eating pizza.
You know you have hit the best years of your life when you enlist the 5 year old to be ball boy during beer pong and pay him with candy you stole from Walgreens
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
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