Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
If I had a quarter for every time I had sex in your bed while you were out of town, I would probably be a lot more willing to buy you new sheets. Hope you're having a nice vacation.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I'm so sick
I would imagine. You did most of your drinking for brazil last night.
That and I think I got food poisoning from sharing nachos with that homeless guy..
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Just made a drug contact standing in the sandwich line in the dining hall. Is this real life?
You're my fucking hero.
So this morning when I woke up. I found my refrigerator open and no more food. It was empty, I'm home alone for the week. Where in hell did that food go?
If I could tell my younger self three things it would be: 1. Smoke a lot more weed 2. Have a lot more sex 3. Own a good set of pots and pans
Randomize
