I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
She just wrapped her tongue around my thumb.....lizard girl may be my next wife.
I didn't know it was possible to throw up mid-sneeze.
if she mentions anything about chili and my phone, just go with it
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
How's work?
Spinning.
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
If you find my integrity anywhere, please tell it to come back home
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