Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
she said she likes her vagina punished
being with you and your tiny dick is punishment enough
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
Dude you make losing your phone an art. You left it balancing on a two liter bottle in the kitchen. Wtf
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
good news: smoking weed at school again, quality of life has improved drastically
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize