I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
There was a tour on campus today, and there were two girls i went to high school with in the group. They saw me and ran up to me as i was unlocking my door. when i opened it, kate was laying in a pile of glitter and beer cans. We need to reevaluate.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
That isn't the worst part. It got a bazillion times more awkward when he read me a poem he wrote about his dead cat.
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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