as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
I feel like "stop licking my face" isn't something that needs to be repeated twice
I command you to take a shot and dance like the pretty little gay boy you are.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
I just literally had a dance party in my closet. I've never been this blazed.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You asked to borrow my glasses for a moment. Then you whipped them at someone's head.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize
