We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I just want to be like i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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