Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Opened my wallet to find a slice of ham with a phone number written on it in sharpie.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
So anyways, we returned the toilet paper and decided to use the money for taco bell and slurpees instead...
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
