So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Making cookies for neighbors. Spill beer all over dough. Bake anyways. From good neighbors back to the shitty college kids next door in under 3 seconds.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
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