Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I'm never telling my kids not to take ecstasy, never. Idk what my mom was thinking.
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Drunk man just fell out of said wheelchair
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
