brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
I have bruises covered in glitter and someone just asked me if I realized I'm bleeding from both ears. This is awkward.
since when did our medecine drawer and our sex drawer become the same drawer? we now have lube covered cough drops.
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
I was doing drugs in the men's room so my employee went in to the woman's for the same reason but left proof and got caught. Had to fire him cuz I bogarted his dope spot. Awesome.
if my uterus stops caving in on itself long enough for me to be alive I'm there
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I downloaded the presidential playlists for offline listening. And Obama made a night one so we have presidential approved fuck jamzzzzz. Thanks Obama!
I need more than 2 fuckable people this is an outrage
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
Mike fell asleep with his hand down my pants. I'm clearly an enticing person.
DONT YOU DARE YELL AT ME. YOU'RE THE ONE WHO TRIED TO PAY FOR THE CAB WITH YOUR PANERA REWARDS CARD.
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