I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
But on the up side she uprooted a whole peony plant from the hotel downtown and said, "I brought you flowers"
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Funny how the post-sex UTI lasted longer than the entire relationship.
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
Randomize
