I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Theres a handprint of sauce on my frig, one streaked across my face, a trail of it to my bedroom and sauce all in my bed and i have no idea what the fuck i ate.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
When God closes one door, he opens up a taller, smarter, more successful door, with a bigger cock and nicer teeth.
Randomize
