i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
In your drunken glory you promised me, tongue, 12 naked pics, and 1,800 breakfasts.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
That was the night I passed out and someone threw chicken at me. SORRY I wasn't available to cockblock you from that Hispanic dude.
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
I just sold Adderall to a priest, im not quite sure how I feel about this situation
The cop asked me why my pants were around my knees when he woke me from the sink, i replied "Officer, my underwear is still on, nothing bad happened" then he nodded in acknowledgement and we carried on with the paper work.
Randomize