What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
And when we woke up we made beer pancakes. Great start to a family picture day.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
One minute you were celebrating, the next you were bleeding all over your Nikes.
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
Randomize
