Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
News update: stealing a playground is harder than it looks.
in the practice room. just found 3 bottles of smirnoff hidden inside the piano. SO glad i didn't get into berklee...
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
She was giving me a handjob while I was wearing a sombrero with a beer in one hand and a hammer in the other.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
What's a sexy way to say balls deep???
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