would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
The only thing better than Call of Duty is getting jerked off while playing Call of Duty.
I just heard the term negative masterbation and I don't believe it
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Then he rubbed shampoo all over my arm and shouted, "Garnier FUCK THIS."
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
In case I die. I'm in ares truck with a bartender named Dave from chuys. JUST IN CASE. And let the people know my last words were suck my dick. My like literally.
I love you more than sex with randoms.... and we all know how much I love that shit.
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
Randomize
