dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Quick question... Why were there condoms frozen into ice cubes?
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Woke up to find that I was cock blocked by no more than three people.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
