i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Sometimes I seriously wonder if I could get away with vodka Sundays at work. Cuz this red bull feels naked.
you're by far the better bro. your dick is more impressively sized, anyway
I hate that you know that from experience
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
You were telling me last night 101 proof was nothing and you needed 400 proof or better yet military or marine proof, because you're marine grade.... You rascal.
I'm puking in a turkey pan....
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
I just poured two shots of fireball into my Rapunzel mug I love finals.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize
