He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
Lost my pants last night. Really need to stop taking shots of whiskey like I'm eating skittles.
Randomize