and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
Senior week was like trying to herd cats. Very drunk cats.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
At this point it's more of an experiment to see how much actual bush growth is possible. See, being single can be both educational and surprisingly comfy!
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Randomize
