No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Just ate a gummy bear I found in my sheets. So yeah, 2013 is SO gonna be my year.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
Yelled "don't taze me bro" as the police officer tazed me. Cross it off the list.
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