Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
His friends call him "Gasm".... Im going for it.
no seriously he was fingering me like he was really really frantically looking for a song on his iPod.
while being fingered today, I was told I have an abnormally deep g-spot. Now you know, I am a size queen because of SCIENCE.
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize
