Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
Why do my orgasm prompt her to begin using babytalk EVERYTIME?!
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
You called me at 3 am and I rode my flat ass bike that I dug out of my garage in the dark to meet you at dunkin donuts for a 10 minute convo about your mother and you didn't drive me home.
you owe me a blunt and a bottle of moscato.
IM WAITING BITCH. ANSWER ME.
My boyfriend sold my favorite shoes right off my fucking feet last night outside the bar. It might have played a part in our breakup today.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I'll do my best. he just keeps yelling beer and doing dick helicopters
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