Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(612): View more from Minnesota

Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.

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(540): View more from Virginia

You only ask me to come over when your gf is gone, and thats usually at midnight to cook chicken salad and watch you pass out

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(727): View more from Florida

There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.

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(708): View more from Illinois

Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.

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(864): View more from South Carolina

Sad Megan is Sad

(1-864): View more from South Carolina

Have you been drinking my beer?

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(801): View more from Utah

The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator

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(585): View more from New York

Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking

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