You can't special order awesome
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
i'm using salt from the free peanuts to stop the bleeding.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Yes. I masterbate to Harry Potter. It's what our generation does.
Hold on, I'm taking nudes in a blanket fort right now
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
