fine then we can just have courtesy sex i definetly won't like it
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
as he was bent over the toilet, he turned to me and said "barbarian kyle is much stronger than regular kyle" and then went right back to puking.
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Randomize
