idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize