Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Tonight we are playing Scuba-Keg. Getting keg now. I'll explain when i get home.
Just woke up. Need to shower and fuck. Be there when I'm done disappointing. Should be 30.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I'm drunk from drinking bourbon out of a "cupcake sippy cup" at the Denny's bar. What the fuck happened to the goals I had?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
A good example of deductive reasoning: Knowing that when my girlfriend texts me "I promise not to smoke all your weed!" that she is...at that VERY moment...Smoking All Of My Weed.
try to milk me bitch
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