SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I found my crush's facebook page. And his wife's. Apparently they are still in love. Of all the people to have happy marriages! Fuck, I'm depressed.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
He wore nothing but a Speedo and a tie to the party. It was great. Everyone was looking at him like "this kid's the best"
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
My bed smells like the plague
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
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